SEAL Team One Shot---Just for Fun

Most of you know my new favorite TV show is SEAL Team. I binge-watched the whole series so far in just a few weeks, and the couple I like finally had their first kiss. In honor of that, I wrote a little one-shot about what our hero Jason might have been thinking as he took that long walk to get to Mandy. (This is just for entertainment purposes and I don't own any of the characters. No copyright infringement is intended.)

I hope my fellow Jason and Mandy fans enjoy it! (Takes place at the end of Season 3 Episode 20 No Choice in Duty.)

Jason had last spoken with Mandy a few hours ago, but her words had echoed through his head ever since: “The hardest part now is knowing I chose to become this person.” 

She’d walked away, but the haunted look in her eyes had made him want to call her back. To remind her of the good she’d done because of the person she’d chosen to be. But he’d let her go.

And wished he hadn’t.

She’d been different since Caracas. Lost, somehow. Her drive and sense of purpose had dimmed. He’d always been able to count on her to find a clear path to executing a mission and helping him get the job done. She was thorough and good at what she did. But after seeing Samim’s widow, the small spark she’d had left inside her flickered out. As soon as the woman had started screaming at Mandy, he’d gotten her out of there, but he hadn’t been fast enough. Mandy believed every word Samim’s wife had flung at her and accepted them as fact. Nothing he’d said to counteract the damage had touched the shadows in Mandy’s eyes. He put his hands in his pockets and blew out a long breath.

He shouldn’t have let her go without helping to drive those shadows away.

He wasn’t used to this Mandy. She was trying to appear unruffled by everything she’d done and seen this deployment, but her guilt and anguish were just beneath the surface like a riptide waiting to drag her down. Mandy’s normal warmth had been replaced by the signature blank face of every other CIA officer he’d ever known.  He could feel her slipping away and he didn’t like it.  She was one of the few who had seen the best and the worst in him and it hadn’t shaken her. Seeing Mandy like this was starting to shake him, though. He wanted to protect her---he always had---but there wasn’t an enemy to shield her from in this situation. She was fighting her own demons.

And he didn’t want her to fight alone. Like he'd had to.

He knocked on her door and waited. When she answered, he took a moment to appreciate how beautiful she was. She was more than just a woman who looked great in a t-shirt and pair of jeans, with a smile that would make any man’s blood run hot. Mandy had a strength about her, a calm and confidence that made him and everyone else instinctively trust her. She could walk in and own a room or be an observer in the back, but she always stood out---especially to him.

She stared at him, her interrogating skills kicking in as she tried to read his facial expression. “You okay?” she finally asked.

That should have been his question. “I’m good.” Jason stepped closer. He didn’t have to ask if she was okay. He could see the dark smudges under her eyes, the weariness in her face. She hadn’t been sleeping. The demons were winning.

And he couldn’t have that.

He wanted to fight them off for her. To hold the darkness back. Looking into her eyes, he silently asked her permission and she gave it, backing up a step so he could shut the door before his lips came down on hers.

He walked her backwards until she was against the wall, never breaking the kiss. Over the years he’d let himself wonder briefly how it would be to kiss her, but he’d always hesitated to make that a reality.

Now he wished he hadn’t taken so long. The scent of lavender clung to her, which was a small miracle since all he ever seemed to smell in the heat of Afghanistan was sweat, earth, and sand. He inhaled again and pressed closer, raising his forearms to each side of her head, caging her between him and the wall. His heart pounded through his chest as their kiss deepened. Her arms found their way around his neck and she held on tightly, as if her knees couldn't hold her upright anymore. 

He leaned his head back slightly to look at her. “Mandy,” he said, his voice hoarse, the only other sound in the room her unsteady breaths. “Are you sure?”

She didn't hesitate and pinned him with her gaze. “Yes.”

He brushed his lips against hers again, then trailed little kisses across her jawline to her ear. “We’ll get through this,” he whispered to her. She’d been on his comms---the voice in his ear---on more operations than he could count, warning him of danger and helping him keep his team safe. Tonight he wanted to be the one keeping her safe. “I’ve got you.” 

He pulled her closer and threaded his hands through her hair. In the moment, she seemed so fragile, but he was going to help her be strong again. They’d always done that for each other.

“Jason,” she murmured, closing her eyes and leaning her forehead against his.

“I know.” He gently cupped her face and lifted her mouth to his. The pain and grief they’d suffered was wrapped up in the tenderness of the moment, giving them both a respite from the storm they’d been living and allowing the kiss to say everything their voices couldn’t.

Their connection was deep and undeniable. What he shared with her was more than friendship. He couldn't describe what she meant to him, but he didn’t have to. She was Mandy. His Mandy. Everything else faded away until it was just them. In this room. Right now.

And that’s all that mattered.